Texas Living

I was born in Texas. But for those of you moving here or visiting here, I was given this amount of information to help you with your transition:

THINGS LEARNED LIVING IN TEXAS
~ A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
~ There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas
~ There are 10,000 types of spiders.  All 10,000 of them live in Texas .
~ If it grows, it’ll stick ya.  If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.
~ ‘Jaw-P?’ means, ‘Did y’all go to the bathroom?
~ There is no such thing as ‘lunch.’ There is only dinner and then there is
supper.
~ Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when
you’re two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
~ “Backwards and forwards” means “I know everything about you.”
~ The word ‘jeet’ is actually a phrase meaning, ‘Did you eat?’
~ You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is.
You work until you’re done or it’s too dark to see.
~ You measure distance in minutes.
~ You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
~ You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Texas  Pete, Tabasco and Ketchup.
~ The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but
require 6 pages for local gossip and high school  football.
~ You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and
Christmas.
~ Fried catfish is the other white meat.

4 Responses to Texas Living

  1. I disagree with the five “spices.” If ketchup makes the list, so should ranch dressing! It’s only fair!! 🙂

  2. Jennet, I agree. I have way more than five basic. But, I only report the news!!! laugh. Hope you guys are well!

  3. Hi Tony, Thanks for reading & following Cedar Park Life. I just saw your tweet about this post and I’m cracking up! Great list.

    My only addition would be: if you stand on a fire ant hill while wearing flip flops, you’ll end up looking like Elaine from Seinfeld doing that weird kicking dance…

    http://theseinfelddictionary.com/2007/12/07/elaine-dance/

  4. Sara
    Thanks for your comment. i am enjoying your tweets. I am not enjoying any of the Starbucks tweets or blog posts. It messes my day up EVERY TIME. I immediately think about dropping everything and heading out for a frap. You might be evil..laugh.

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